It was one of those nights that I set my mind into deep thoughts.
Yea, i was home alone with just my lil bro doing his own stuffs.
I was blog-hopping and I chanced upon this blog.
The blog owner got this chunk of stuffs from a forum.
"As soon as anyone has a belief that the other person "would never leave me" then it's an announcement of a one-up. And if you're worried that your partner will leave you then you're coming out as a one-down. The best relationships happen when each partner believe themselves to be one-downs. That's why, in long lasting relationships, partners are often announced as "my better half."
"But I am very wary about concluding that the 'one down' then must act unavailable and all that. That is just tactics that hides the underlying problem: some people have lower self-esteem and are more needy than others. It is not about being more "loving" in the relationship, but about one partner being more needy than the other. Moreover, acting like someone you are not, is very difficult to do over a long time."
“i agree that the one who cares less controls the relationship. but i have learnt that in such instances, i pull back.. I know it's easier said then done, It's hard, specially when you yearn for the person, and have to put your foot down and play it cool.. . But when pulling back you have to keep in check as well that they aren't just interested bcos they suddenly may not have you. it can't be a cat and mouse game forever. ”
All these comes from this phrase "the one who loves the least, controls the r/s".
I gotta admit that in my r/s too.
It had always been boy like girl, girl don't like boy yet, then slowly seeing the boy's effort, girl like boy too, then they got together happily, but slowly boy's feeling t the girl decreased whereas girl's feeling t the boy increased, boy wanted t break up with the girl.
At least, to me, I've been through this kinda process.
I know it's weird 'cause I really love the other party wholeheartedly but all i got was a breakup.
So aft some setbacks, I got into this mentality which is don't love the other party so much.
But the amount of love is unmeasurable.
If you really love the other party, how are you gonna lessen your care towards him right?
Although somehow this theory of trying not t get myself hurt is theoritically right but it's logically wrong.
How I hate myself for being so weak!
Why can't I get t control my own feeling input?
Well, if we do get t control, wouldn't this world be filled with all the fake people around 'cause everyone is controlling their feelings.
And there's no true feelings input.
Well, if you really tries t control the amount of feelings input then you can never enjoy the pleasure of real love.
So frustrating uh?
As much as I yearn for a simple and true r/s, I couldn't help giving myself layers of protection.
I'm sick of stressing this over and over t myself but what t do?
-sighsigh-
:( :( :(
:( :( :(
